• Rafaella

Want to Have Mindful Sex? Use This Guided Meditation


Queer women in shower having mindful sex

In my work as a sex and trauma therapist, I often have clients who share that they struggle with staying present in their bodies, especially during sex. They may not feel connected to their body, are wondering how their body looks, or may think of their to-do list as opposed to staying present in the moment.


If you’re nodding your head as you read this, you’ve come to the right place. I put together a mindful meditation to help you remove distractions and blocks you experience during sex. Whether you’re new to meditation or a novice, this guided meditation can enhance your sexual experiences so you can access holistic pleasure.


What is Mindful Sex?


Mindful sex is the practice of being present during sex. Instead of getting lost in thought, you fully immerse your body, mind, and senses into the experience. When you’re distracted during sex, it can keep you from reaching the height of pleasure you desire. It can also prevent you from speaking up about what feels good, neutral, and uncomfortable. Sometimes, you may even struggle to orgasm or lose your momentum.


Benefits of Meditation During Sex


Meditation can help you become more mindful -- meaning, you’re fully aware and present in the moment. It is a powerful tool that can be used to improve all facets of your life, be it sex, the quality of your work, or your emotional intelligence. That said, it has immense benefits and can improve your quality of life.


According to research from the National Center for Biotechnology Information, some of the benefits of meditation include:

  • Reduces blood pressure

  • Increases happiness

  • Decreases depression

  • Reduces stress

  • Improves self-awareness

  • Lengthens attention span

  • Can improve sleep

So, how can these benefits help you in the bedroom? If you can use meditation to boost your awareness, reduce stress, and improve your attention span during sex, you can shut down wandering thoughts and bring your attention back to your pleasure.


In fact, studies show mindfulness can help minimize cognitive interference, or unwanted thoughts, during sex, thus improving sexual satisfaction and self-esteem. Additionally, mindfulness during sex can decrease pain during sex, increase sexual arousal and wetness, help you feel more connected to yourself and partner(s), and increase body appreciation.


How to Relax Your Mind Before Sex


Two women in shower having mindful sex

Relaxing your mind before sex takes practice, so a guided meditation is a good way to get started. This guided meditation* I created will center your sense of sound and touch to help you reach a state of calm and connection to your body. Ultimately, you should feel more grounded and aware of your body.


Mindfulness Meditation Practices


When you get distracted during sex, use your voice and meditation to bring you back to attention. Sounds you can make while meditating to improve mindfulness during sex include: